Posted By: Niki Payne Date: 11-26-2018 Comments: 0
Clover dating app recently released a dating trends survey that revealed the top 30 first date hot spots. Starbucks was by far the most popular first-date venue, but what surprised me the most was how 7-Eleven made the list!
Now, I don’t know about you, but if my recent match took me to 7-Eleven for our first date, there most certainly would not be a second date. It’s no wonder so many single women are frustrated by the current dating landscape. But what if it’s that exact type of judgment that is keeping singles perpetually single?
“We were a little surprised to see so many popular fast food chains and convenience stores appearing in the top 30, perhaps this is a direct result of more places adopting coffee shop style experiences,” said Isaac Raichyk, CEO of Clover. “Men are more willing to commit to a first meeting over dinner at a restaurant while women want to screen dates quickly over coffee.”
Upon further speculation, it actually makes a lot of sense. The public setting and sheer volume of 7-Eleven stores in the U.S. make it fairly convenient for people to meet for the first time, and even easier to leave if two people aren’t really feeling each other.
“I suspect that 7-Eleven is the first phase in a potential first date; meet there and then go elsewhere,” said Clover Public Relations Director Miranda McCurlie. Fair point.
If you’ve ever been to The Great Love Debate, you’ll often hear host Brian Howie say, “Women look for red flags while men look for green lights.” And the audience laughs right on cue because it’s true. It seems as though many singles have become so conditioned to focus on what they don’t want that they’ve completely lost sight of what they do want. I can personally attest to this.
When I first started getting into the law of attraction, it dawned on me that I was the one perpetuating my dating woes as I began to notice the patterns of my thought and how they would materialize in my love life. I would judge men for their ability to plan a date or carry a conversation with me. I would judge them for the way they dressed or whether they paid for the date. I would even judge them for their chivalry, or lack thereof. As a result, I’d frequently end up on dates with men who would put in zero effort to connect with me and still expected me to fall in their pants.
One day, I decided to start experimenting with this law of attraction thing. After every date experience, I adopted a new habit of identifying one redeeming quality from every person I met. The idea behind this new practice was not to find a reason to like someone, but rather to manifest those desired qualities in future matches.
So what if he was slightly shorter than me; I really appreciate his charisma and authenticity. So what if he didn’t buy me dinner or drinks; I really appreciate how well the conversation flowed between us. So what if there wasn’t this cosmic connection between us; I really appreciate his sense of humor. So what if one date doesn’t lead to happily ever after; I’m grateful to know good guys really do exist.
Through this simple practice of feeling gratitude for every person I went on a date with, I eventually attracted a man into my life that exhibited the qualities I was most looking for in a partner. So you can imagine how heartbroken I was when it abruptly ended six months later. So what if he ghosted me without explanation; I appreciated how well he treated me when we were together.
I’ve come to learn that gratitude is the antidote to unrequited love and perpetual loneliness. It’s hard to be angry and easier to forgive when I am feeling grateful. In fact, I believe that gratitude is an act of love in itself that serves as a pathway to healing. Think about it.
When you acknowledge and appreciate all that is good in your life, it can boost your self-esteem, raise your confidence and increase your date-ability. And there is no better way to demonstrate your ability to love another than by your ability to practice self-love. Even more, gratitude breeds connection to what matters most in your life and fosters deeper relationships with those whom you express gratitude toward.
Make gratitude a daily habit in every area of your life. Attract the perfect partner by allowing yourself to vibrate at a whole new, magnetic frequency. And don’t be surprised when love enters your life in unexpected ways.
Niki Payne is a writer, singles coach and certified hypnotherapist. She helps single women achieve personal success in their career and relationships. Contact Niki at www.nikipayne.com.