Posted By: Kelly Seal Date: 09-20-2018 Comments: 0
What if I told you one simple phrase could change the entire trajectory of your dating life? What if I told you a slight shift in perspective is all it takes to attract more of what you want and less of what you don’t want? When it comes to relationships, a little less criticism and a little more gratitude can make a world of difference in the quality of the people you date.
Many of our ideals about romantic love can be gleaned from Hollywood movies and fables we grew up with. We envision that moment of clarity, when we look across a crowded room and make eye contact with a potential soul mate, and magically, everything falls into place. Falling in love with the right person should be a straightforward path. Instead, navigating through relationships have become more of a rat maze.
Real life is not as simple as we’d like. It takes effort to find “the one,” and it’s hard when a new relationship with lots of chemistry suddenly sizzles, or when the man you’ve decided to date turns out to be a different person than you imagined. Yes, we make mistakes and we all get our hearts broken from time to time but, most importantly, we get up and try again because human connection is a basic human need we all crave and desire no matter where we’re at in life.
It’s possible to turn your love life around, even when you are feeling frustrated and despondent about love. And I’ve found the best way is to shift your perspective through one simple mantra: I am grateful.
Ask yourself: “What am I grateful for today?”
Gratitude is a miracle cure, and I don’t say this lightly. When you concentrate on what you already have in your life, instead of focusing on what is missing, you shift your whole perspective. You become more content, happier with where you are, and because of that, you can attract the same to you.
Having a mantra means cultivating a practice. It doesn’t work to make one list of all the things you’re grateful for, stuff it in a drawer, and then the next day forget all about it and go back to thinking of everything that is missing. Instead, it’s important to wake up every morning and ask one simple question: “What am I grateful for today?”
Some things to think about when you are practicing your daily gratitude mantra:
Pick someone in your life, and acknowledge your appreciation.
This could be a good friend, a parent, a sibling, or someone who made a difference in your life exactly when you needed them most. Write a letter to this person, expressing your gratitude and how much it means to have them in your life. You can choose to send it or hold onto it – the point is to express it on paper, so you can more fully appreciate the people who care for you.
Consider your past relationships.
We’ve all had good and bad relationships in our lives. I’d like you to consider those people who broke your heart, who made mistakes, and to think about what they have taught you. Are you more considerate with the hearts of others as a result? It’s important to have gratitude for the lessons we learn in life – even if they’re hard lessons to learn. Relationships, no matter how rocky, are good teachers.
Think about your daily life.
Do you like the taste of coffee in the morning or the way the sky looks on a cloudy day? Do you enjoy the smell of your favorite soap when you take a shower or the challenging yoga class you take every Saturday? It’s often the little moments in life that leave us with lasting emotional impact because we remember how they make us feel. Focus your attention on what makes you happy each day, no matter how small, and soon you’ll be feeling more positive in other areas of your life – including your love life.
Set an intention for what you want to create.
Life isn’t just about dealing with difficulties. It also provides us the opportunity to create something beautiful. When you focus your gratitude mantra on what you do have control of – yourself – you can shift your focus from “what is happening to me” to “what experience can I create for myself today?” Whether you like to write, explore a new neighborhood, paint, go for a hike, or tackle a home project, it shifts your perspective from passive to active, which is empowering.
Being happy doesn’t always make us grateful, yet being grateful will usually bring us happiness. When you practice your gratitude mantra, you are making room for more love in your life, which means romantic love, too.
What are you grateful for today? Let that feeling radiate from your heart and attract the right person into your life.